Back at it

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

I’m passing out the refreshments
Me: Would you like a drink?
Lady: No thank you
Me: Would you like a muffin?
Lady: Do you have the money?
Me: No, just juice and muffins.
Lady: You’re a damn cheat, that’s what you are.
Me: I’m sorry, here’s a muffin.

Old man wandering down the hall
Me: Where are you off to?
Old man: I can’t find my wife; do you know where she is?
Me: No, I don’t, but let’s get you settled back in bed.
Old man: I am a horrible husband, I lost my wife.
Me: Here’s her picture. She’s beautiful.
Old man: I know, but I can’t find her…It’s awful when you lose your loved ones.

Funny old man: I had a dream about you last night.
Me: Uh, you did? [awkward]
Funny old man: Yup, you were there.
Me: Um, okay. Would you like some coffee?
Funny old man doesn’t hear me and leaves…
Funny old man comes back a few minutes later…
Funny old man: Here, will you be my Easter bunny?
Funny old man hands me a stuffed Easter bunny rabbit.
Me: Um, well, you keep your bunny and we can just be friends.
Funny old man: Hey that’s fine with me!

Old lady: No, I don’t want that new girl to help. She knows nothing.
Me: Well how do you expect me to learn if you don’t let me try?
Old lady: Well you can try on others, just not on me.
Me: Point taken.

Old man wandering down the hall again
Me: Can I help you with something?
Old man: I don’t think so. I’m going to the bathroom.
Me: Well, it’s back that way…I point him in the right direction.
Old man: Well, you seem to know everything. I’m glad I met you.
Me: Thank you. I’m glad I met you too.

Confused old man: Can you pick that up for me? He points to his shoe…
Me: Pick what up?
Confused old man: The black package, it’s for my brother.
Me: Um, it’s your shoe.
Confused old man: Don’t argue with me young lady, get my brother on the phone.
Me: Okay, I’ll pick it up for you…I pick up his foot…
Confused old man: OUCH, that’s my foot, what the heck are you doing?

Funny lady: Hello dear.
Me: Hello, would you like something to drink?
Funny lady: Yes please.
Me: Here you go…
Funny lady: Thanks. Are you new here?
Me: Yes, I am. Relatively new.
Funny lady: I know, I could tell cause you’ve got a smile on your face.




posted by Rachel Pede @ 11:09 PM   2 comments