Since my stories are so popular
Monday, March 27, 2006
Creepy old man grabbing at my hand: Hey, where is that girl?
Me: What girl?
Man: The pretty one?
Me: Who me?
Man: The one wearing pink.
Note: I was wearing blue. SLAM.Fun old man BLEARING Elton John from his room: Hey nurse, want a beer?
Me calling up to a different floor: Hi, may I please speak with house keeping.
4th floor: One second please.
Housekeeping: Hello?
Me: Hi, yes, I need some soap for the bathroom please. It’s empty.
Housekeeping: Empty?
Me: Yes, nothing is coming out, so empty.
Housekeeping: Well, you’ll have to wait til the afternoon shift gets there, that is their job.
Me: Wait until 12? It’s only 9:30. It’s just soap, heck I’ll get it myself if you’ll just tell me where it is…
Housekeeping: 12 o’clock, then you can have soap.
Next time, I’m bringing my own. Frig.Old man giving me the stare down…
Me, approaching, afraid…
Man: I’ll kill you I will, you evil BLEEP.
Me: Um, why?
Man: You stole my pillow.
Me: It’s right here…on your lap.
Man: Oh, thank you nurse.
One man writes note to other resident asking her back to his room later…female resident replies flattered, “thank you but no.�
Me: Here sir, hold this rail and my hand and I’ll help you stand up.
Old man with a muffled voice: That’s not all I’d like to hold…
Me: The hand will do.
Old Lady is screaming bloody murder. Am I…
- Stabbing her with her breakfast fork?
- Throwing her wheelchair at her?
- Crashing her into a wall?
- Putting on her shirt?
The correct answer is…..4
Last one for today’s shift…
Lady: How old are you?
Me: just turned 21 in January
Lady: oh, you’re too young and pretty to be working here, come back in a few years…
I like ending off on a good note.